2016 Year of the Monkey

I have been struggling with what the I Ho Chuan has done for me blog.   I have been in this program a long time but I am slow to change ... I never jumped into all aspects of the program and so its been me adding a few things every year.  Have I met all my goals? The kung fu ones have improved a lot ... my commitment to completing them is getting better every year.  My personal goals not so good.   It seems that if I make a promise to others I really work at meeting it, but personal goals are a promise to me and for some reason I feel okay letting those ones slide.  And yet are the kung fu goals not for me?  Am I doing them for other people?  All my informal journaling has made me think ... 

I do better at the kung fu goals because I am part of the team and we support and motivate one another, my personal goals ... well its all on me and it appears that I am not very self motivated or self disciplined.   I look at people like Sifu Brandi Beckett and her husband Simon or Sifu Melanie Beckett, and I see people who are very self motivated both in their kung fu and personal goals.  Is it a personality trait, can it be learned because if it can where did they learn it?   I raised two of them and they didn't learn it from me! I have not been able to carry the I Ho Chuan - kung fu successes into my personal life that well.  Did I learn Spanish?  No!   Did I take the art classes?  No!  Did I loose weight?  No!  Do I meditate?  No!  I am still working at eliminating plastic from my life and eating healthy and these are goals from a couple of years ago.  I have seen success in my ballroom dancing however again there is someone else involved (my hubby) and I share the success with him.   It appears that I need that external something that a partner/team provides to motivate me to DO SOMETHING!  I won't do it for myself alone.  I am not sure if this a good or a bad thing, a weakness or a strength, or perhaps it is just my personality that finds more richness in shared experiences.

see Sifu Langer we can all get ourselves going around in circles.